Today's Quote
One man with courage makes a majority.
-Andrew Jackson
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Blonde jokes Ann's boss sent to her.. cute.. and clean..
Subject: Helloooo..Blond Jokes
THE MOON
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on
a bench talking........and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you
think is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says
"Helloooooooooo!!! can you see Florida.......?????"
CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station.
She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes,
it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and
asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would
get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then
today you expect me to show it to you!"
RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes
to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she
shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down
the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding
car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see
that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was
oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his
window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled , "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were
talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the
moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be
the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each
other and shook their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll
burn up!" said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid,
you know. We're going at night!"
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.
It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can
you
hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE
JOKES!
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had
acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was
named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone
naming dogs like that?"
"HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond.
"They're watch dogs
Don
THE MOON
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on
a bench talking........and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you
think is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says
"Helloooooooooo!!! can you see Florida.......?????"
CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station.
She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes,
it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and
asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would
get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then
today you expect me to show it to you!"
RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes
to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she
shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down
the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding
car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see
that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was
oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his
window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled , "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were
talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the
moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be
the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each
other and shook their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll
burn up!" said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid,
you know. We're going at night!"
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.
It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can
you
hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE
JOKES!
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had
acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was
named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone
naming dogs like that?"
"HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond.
"They're watch dogs
Don
The birthday boy.... and his dad had a celebration this past weekend.. Andrew is now officially four, deemed so by all his family!! the photos are at http://www.paynecountyline.com/gallery. Enjoy!
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